Burning
by nightviolets
Summary: Sequel to Drowning. Five months after the tragic incident with Masaomi, Izaya finds something that can take away the pain he'd been enduring since that day. Can be read without the prequel.
1. Chapter 1

_Surprise! ^_^ _

_**Warnings**: underage sex, underage drinking, frequent discussion of suicidal thoughts and past attempts_

_I do not own Durarara! or any of the characters._

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><p><strong>5 Months Earlier<strong>

_"How is he? Can I see him?"_

_"He's in a coma right now, but it looks like he'll pull through. Only legal guardians and immediate family members can see him until his legal guardian specifies otherwise."_

_Izaya fell back into his seat, unable to stand anymore due to his overwhelming relief. He spoke in a hushed tone, not wanting to disclose his personal business to anyone. "You're speaking about Kida Masaomi?" _

_"I am. Are you his legal guardian? I need you to sign a few forms."_

_"No," he said quietly—but he would be._

_"Sir?"_

_Izaya narrowed his eyes. "Do you need me at this moment? You can't wait?"_

_"Well… I suppose we can hold off on the paperwork for now."_

_"I'll contact the front desk when I'm ready. I have some things to take care of first." Once the man had left, he pulled the note Masaomi had written out of his back pocket. After reading it, he returned it to his back pocket, left the hospital, and made a few calls, using many resources and a lot of blackmail to be appointed as Masaomi's legal guardian._

_He filled out a few forms when he returned to the hospital, and then walked into Masaomi's room. He sat on a chair next to his bed and grabbed the boy's hand, placing a gentle kiss on it. "Masaomi…"_

* * *

><p><strong>Present Day<strong>

He visited nearly every day. Since it was a regular occurrence, word had spread that Orihara Izaya regularly saw a teenage boy in the hospital. Practically all of Ikebukuro knew. Because it was now common knowledge, Izaya had considered moving Masaomi to a different hospital, or even to his own home, but he had paid for a secluded, luxurious room, and the staff at the current hospital were courteous. They were also wary of the informant, and kept any suspicious visitors away from Kida's room, knowing that Izaya would somehow find out if they slipped up. He had a nurse call him whenever someone signed in to see the boy, which was a rarity, anyway. Nobody would harm Masaomi under his watch, or they—and anyone involved—would face the wrath of one of the most dangerous and deadly men in Tokyo.

As always, he signed in, acknowledged the nurses, ignored the stunned other visitors, and strolled into Masaomi's room, shutting the door behind him. He sat in the armchair next to the bed and gazed at the boy.

"Some say that comatose patients can hear what's going on around them," he mused. "I see it as wishful thinking, but I understand how it could be therapeutic to have this belief. After all, I come here and speak as if I'm having a conversation with you. It's kind of nice, not having to hear your bratty complaints and sarcastic insults. Still, I do miss conversing with you. You're quite intelligent for your age; you have insight and imaginative ideas that many adults have never thought of. You've taught me things that I consider valuable information: the fragility of a human heart, how insecurity can affect one's view of everything around him, and even my own feelings. You showed me that I can love one human above the others. Whether or not that's a positive thing, I'm still not sure, especially since you're in this dormant state, but I think I'll learn the answer someday. I am a patient man."

Izaya threw his legs onto the bed and crossed his arms. "I wonder what you'd make of this, Masaomi. I visit you multiple days a week for anytime between ten minutes and two hours. I tell you about my day, reminisce on our past, and speak fondly of the future I wish for us to have. I'd like to think that you can hear me. That way, when you wake up, you might finally realize that you were never and could never be a burden to me. I don't see how I could speak to a teenager that I consider annoying in an extended sleep for usually the majority of the days in a week. If you can hear me, hopefully you'll understand that I've truly loved you all this time."

Izaya stood and leaned over the bed. He kissed the blond's forehead and smiled before turning away. "I love you, Masaomi."

"I don't remember saying that you can address me so informally, Izaya-san."

The informant spun around to see Kida's eyes open, his arms up in a stretch and a playful smile across his face. "Masaomi," he breathed. He held the boy's hand between his and looked at him, ruby eyes gleaming. "I missed you so much."

The teen moved back slightly.

"What's wrong?" Izaya asked, concerned.

"I've just…never seen you show so much emotion. It's intense."

The corners of Izaya's mouth curled upwards. "Well, you'll have to get used to that. I've had a lot of time to assess my feelings while you were asleep, and I've realized that I have very strong ones towards you."

"Me too."

The older male sat on the edge of the bed next to the boy and combed through the golden hair.

"So, um, why am I…alive?" he asked, avoiding the man's eyes. He was able to recall the night he had—only nearly, apparently—committed suicide.

"I was able to get you to the hospital before you lost too much blood. It was still a lot, though, and your body couldn't fully function. So, you fell into a coma while your body healed itself. I'm so glad I found you before…" He swallowed, remembering the fearful experience. "I read the note, and we need to have a serious discussion about why this happened. But that'll happen at a later time. For now, we can just be thankful that you're still here."

Masaomi blushed at the emotion-packed statement. He cleared his throat before speaking. "How long have I been…in a coma?"

"About five months."

Kida raised his eyebrows. "I guess I've missed a lot, then?"

"Not much has changed. My visits here have been the buzz for awhile, but there's not much interesting gossip besides that going around—I'd know."

"What do people think…we are? What have you told them?"

"I've said that it's our business to anyone who's asked. The rumors are what you'd expect: we're dating, we're lovers, you owe me a debt, I put you in the coma and feel guilty, I put you in the coma and am making sure you stay in it, etcetera. But let's not think about that right now. All I want right now is to be with you." He leaned forward and kissed Masaomi.

Kida held the older male's hand and returned the kiss. He pulled away after hearing quiet giggles. "Izaya-san, there are nurses staring at us from the door."

"I don't really care." He firmly grasped the boy's chin to keep his head in place. "I've waited five months for this moment, and I won't let a few young nurses ruin it. If it's uncomfortable, I can make them leave."

"Well, what do they think you are to me?"

"Your legal guardian."

Masaomi brushed the man's hand away and placed a hand on Izaya's chest, distancing them. "Legal guardians aren't supposed to make out with whomever they're…watching over. Won't you get in trouble? I could be sent to child services or—"

"Masaomi, hush. I appointed myself as your guardian so I could make decisions for you about where you stay and the treatments you receive. I'm fairly certain none of the nurses or doctors think that we actually have a guardian-minor relationship."

"You mean… They know we're hooking up?"

Izaya sighed. "Don't call it 'hooking up.' It's more than that." The back of his hand grazed the blond's cheek. "They only know the rumors. I haven't affirmed or denied claims to anyone who has asked. But I do know that the most popular explanation for my care of you is that we're in a relationship. Nobody is going to stop us from kissing. However, someone may step in if I tie you to the bed, which I will do if you continue to try to ruin our cherished reunion."

Kida threw his arms around the man's neck and pecked his lips. "Better?"

"It's a start." He cradled the back of the boy's head and wrapped an arm around his waist.

"Can you make them leave?"

Izaya turned and threw a deathly glare at the three women standing at the door. Seeing the piercing crimson eyes, they blushed and scurried away. Once they were gone, he shifted their positions so he was propped up on the pillows with Masaomi on top of him. "Satisfied?"

"Yes." He used Izaya's shoulders to hoist himself up the man's body in order to reach his lips. "I could hear you talking to me—well, bits and pieces. I heard everything today. Izaya-san, I… I love you too."

The raven smiled. "I'm glad to hear it. Also, I think we've reached the point where honorifics aren't necessary."

"Izaya," he breathed, his tongue tingling at the familiarity he was now allowed to use around the man.

After a few minutes of kissing, Masaomi pulled away to rest his head on Izaya's chest. He wrapped his arms around the informant and closed his eyes. "I'm sorry," he said faintly.

"I know," he replied, petting the sandy hair. "I don't ever want you to feel unwanted or expendable. I'm not sure if you've realized it, but I'm just as dependent on you as you are on me. I'm happy when I'm with you. I love you, Masaomi, more than anything else. I came here and talked to you about us, hoping that you could hear me, so you could know how loved you are. Don't try to leave me again, Masaomi. I can't lose you again—I _won't_ lose you again."

Kida squeezed his eyes shut tighter, refusing to cry. "I'm so sorry," he croaked. "I had no idea… I didn't know how much you care." He clutched onto the man's shirt as a flood of emotions overwhelmed him. He felt guilty for leaving Izaya alone; overjoyed to hear everything he had always wanted to hear; sad to have missed five months he could've spent with Izaya; confused about where they stood—the status of their relationship and where to go from here; fearful in knowing that he'd soon have to confront what he'd done; content to be in the arms of the man he loved—who loved him in return. He must've been mumbling some of his thoughts, because Izaya was hastily trying to calm him.

"Hey, it's all right. Don't worry about all of that. We'll deal with each issue at a pace that you're comfortable with. Right now, I'm going to get the doctor. He'll take your vitals, and then I'll fill out the paperwork to have you released." He swiftly left the bed, laid the boy on it, and left the room. "I'll be right back."

Once Izaya was gone, Masaomi made his way to his private bathroom—not without noticing his luxurious hospital room. Izaya must've gone out of his way and spent a lot of money to get the fancy room. He brushed away the pang of guilt as he entered the bathroom. It was generally what he expected of a hospital bathroom, only larger and cleaner. He looked in the mirror and examined himself. His hair was slightly disheveled—from Izaya's petting, but was otherwise in good condition—freshly dyed, he noted; his teeth were whiter than he remembered and his breath was minty; he smelled like soap; he had deodorant and antiperspirant on; his clothes were clean; his fingernails and toenails were trimmed neatly; a clean shave was evident by the smooth, unblemished skin of his face. Izaya had either spent far too much money on having him pampered, had connections in the hospital, or was feared enough to get Masaomi the best care. He figured that it was a combination of the three.

After returning to his bed, he examined his wrists. They were completely healed; which wasn't strange—it had been five months. The only indication that something had happened was a faint light brown scar on each wrist. He clasped his hands together as Izaya entered with a middle aged doctor slightly taller than the informant.

"Hello, Kida-kun, I'm Dr. Shi, your primary. How are you feeling?"

"Um, good. I'm a little hungry, I guess, but I feel fine."

"Good, but I was referring to your emotional condition. What thoughts are you having?"

"Well… I feel a bit overwhelmed with my feelings about how I got here, and that I'll have to deal with them soon." He left out his feelings having to do with Izaya. "Besides that, I'm well."

"Since you ended up here from a suicide attempt, I'd like to keep you here for observation for a few days. You'll talk to a therapist and psychologist, and have a…family meeting with your guardian." Masaomi sensed slight disapproval in his tone.

Izaya spoke up. "I understand your concern, but I'm taking him home immediately. He'll be under close watch for the next few weeks. We'll seek professional help if necessary."

The doctor sighed. "I agreed not to have him stay in the psychiatric ward, but I must insist that he stay here. It'll only be a few days. We can wheel in another bed if you'd like to stay with him the whole time."

"Yes, yes. I hear you, Shi-san, but I will be taking him home immediately. I'd like to get him back into his normal routine right away, so we can discuss what happened in a more comfortable environment. Frankly, he doesn't get along well with psychiatrists and psychologists. I'm the only one he confides in, and I won't push him to be open with a stranger." He sat down on the hospital bed and held his young lover's hand.

"Well—"

"I'm sure you wouldn't want to make him uncomfortable, right, Shi-san? He'd much rather be home with me. You aren't going to prevent him from going to where he belongs, now, are you? He needs my comfort, and I hope we can come to an agreement about this. I'm not in the mood for negotiating, and I'd like to leave quickly. I'm also sure a smart man such as yourself understands that his guardian knows what is best for his emotional needs better than doctors."

The man cleared his throat. "All right, then. You can ask the front desk for exit forms when you're ready to depart." He left the room without another word.

Masaomi touched Izaya's face to get his attention. "You're terrifying," he said with a smile.

"Nothing will come between us, and I'll do whatever's necessary to make sure of that. I have a reputation in this city, and I have been and will use that to my advantage."

"What exactly is 'us'? Are we still lovers, are we in a relationship…?"

"Do you love me?"

"Well, yes."

"I'd like to be in a relationship with you. I mean, we'd be a fucked up couple, but at least we'd be together in the way we want. We can move at whatever pace—"

"Okay. So pretty much all that's changed is that my possessive lover is now my overly-protective boyfriend?"

Izaya smiled. "That sounds about right." A devilish smirk grew on his face, and he trailed his fingers up Masaomi's thigh. "You know, I haven't asked for the discharge forms yet…"

Masaomi brushed away the man's hand and blushed lightly. "We can do that later."

The informant sighed exaggeratedly. "Fine, fine. I'll go fill out the exit forms."

Izaya returned a few minutes later. "Ready to go?" When Masaomi nodded, Izaya grabbed his hand and led him towards the exit. He looked down to see a light pink color tinting the boy's cheeks. "What's wrong?"

Kida looked at the ground, avoiding Izaya's, and everyone else's, gaze. "People are looking at us," he mumbled quietly.

"So? Those people are unimportant, and irrelevant to our relationship. They don't decide how we act around each other." Izaya stopped walking to cup Masaomi's face in both of his hands. "We love each other, and love isn't something to be ashamed of or embarrassed by. Now, let's go to my place. We have many things to discuss."

Masaomi blushed. "Okay," he replied timidly. Smiling softly, his cheeks still a bit pink, Masaomi slid his hand into Izaya's, linking their fingers together. He was optimistic that his life would change for the better.


	2. Chapter 2

As Masaomi stood in the elevator with Izaya, he started to experience an uneasy feeling. It intensified as the elevator ascended, and peaked just outside the door of the apartment.

Izaya looked at Masaomi after unlocking the door—who stood a good distance away from him with his head down. Wordlessly, he stepped forward and hugged the boy, gently rubbing his back.

Masaomi hugged him back, greatly comforted by the sweet, simple gesture. He closed his eyes and rested his head against his boyfriend's chest.

"I want you to live with me."

Masaomi's eyes opened. It wasn't a request, but the voice was soft enough that it didn't sound like a command, either. Now that they had confessed to each other, he didn't really see a reason not to live with his new partner. "Okay," he said sheepishly.

Izaya smiled and pulled away. He grabbed his hand and led them into the apartment. "Welcome home." After shutting and locking the door, as he slipped his shoes off, he noticed the blond looking at him with big, watery eyes.

"Home…"

Izaya gently pushed Masaomi against the wall and kissed him slowly, passionately. He followed the man's rhythm, melting into a kind of intimate connection he'd never experienced. A few tears rolled down his cheeks. He was so happy.

Izaya slightly pulled away. "I love you, Masaomi."

Kida was lost in the informant's eyes. "Please say it again."

The older male smiled. "I love you so much, Masaomi. I've loved you for months, and I'll love you forever. _I love you_."

"Izaya…" he breathed, unable to form any other words. When he was picked up, he wrapped his arms around the man's neck. His heart raced as he was laid on the bed. As Izaya undid his belt, a thought occurred to him. "You said five months, right? Have you—during that time… I mean… Did you ever…?" He looked at the informant desperately, figuring that his thoughts were clear from his expression.

Izaya removed Masaomi's jeans and kissed along his neck. "There was no one else. You're the only person that I desire. I didn't even feel any sexual urges for those five months."

Masaomi's smile quickly faded. His pulse raced even faster. "Izaya, I don't feel good," he said weakly.

Izaya looked at the boy. "In what way? Do you feel nauseous, sore, have a headache, etc.?"

"I don't know, I just feel kind of weak."

"It must be because I pretty much rushed you out of the hospital without letting you adjust first. I didn't want to use a wheelchair because it would attract even more unwanted attention. Besides that, you seemed fine." He kissed Masaomi's cheek and ran his fingers through the blond hair.

"Izaya, I'm really excited to be with you, and I know it's been a long time for you, but…" He trailed off, not sure how to tell his lover who had been yearning to see him for months that he wasn't in the mood. He wasn't in the best condition, and everything was emotionally overwhelming, as well.

"I understand," the informant said in a sweet voice, smiling softly. "I don't mind waiting. Take as much time as you need."

Masaomi smiled back. "Thank you."

Izaya pecked Masaomi's lips. "You must be tired. If you want to take a nap, I can bring over your stuff from your apartment. I'll put all your furniture in storage and rent out the unit for you."

Masaomi looked at the man with adoring eyes. "That sounds…great. Thank you."

"Anything for you, darling." Izaya kissed the boy's forehead, tucked him under the sheets, and went to work doing what he'd said.

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><p>As the days passed, Masaomi slowly began to feel uncomfortable with Izaya. It was a strange feeling. He was treated kindly and all his needs were given high priority, but something seemed different, as if Izaya had changed during those months that he was in a coma. It wasn't a good change, as if he'd come to express his emotions better—though he did, somewhat. He couldn't figure out exactly what it was, but something seemed off about the informant.<p>

After the first few days, he'd guessed that it might be because they'd yet to have sex, so Masaomi approached Izaya and effectively seduced him. Although Izaya voiced his affections while they were intimate, the words seemed hollow and unemotional. His movements were almost mechanical, and the only foreplay was preparing Masaomi the least amount necessary to avoid a lot of pain. It was all he could do not to burst into tears because of how horrible their first time as a couple was. When he took a shower right afterwards, he threw up and sobbed quietly, not able to stop crying for about a half-hour. He had taken a nap immediately following his shower to avoid the man.

There was something very wrong, and he wanted to ask Izaya, but he seemed perfectly content with the way things were going. Maybe _Masaomi_ was the problem. This was the man that he'd tried to kill himself for to avoid being a burden, someone he was passionately infatuated with. Where had that desire gone off? He so badly wanted to go back to how things were before the incident. A time when he thought that his love was one-sided and he was merely being used somehow sounded better than being in a relationship with the man. He had what he had always wanted, so why was he unhappy?

Masaomi straddled his boyfriend on the couch, his arms around Izaya's neck as his own was bitten. He let out a moan as he listlessly stared at the bookshelf. He was accustomed to pretending that he enjoyed their activities. After all, his body was responding well, so it wasn't too difficult to just go along with it. His reverie was broken when Izaya grabbed his wrist and placed his hand on his tented crotch. Right; he'd been neglecting the man while he was being given pleasure. He rubbed the fabric for a while, and then undid the man's pants. After taking out the hardened member, he slid off the couch and onto his knees to immediately bob his head and effortlessly deep throat the large length.

Kida remembered when he used to enjoy giving Izaya head. He would greedily swallow every drop and shamelessly make comments about the taste, his own arousal, and the man's size. Now it seemed almost like a chore. He didn't hate doing it, but he no longer enjoyed it in the least. When the man climaxed, he gagged, not expecting the sudden release. Once he composed himself, Masaomi swallowed, and then looked up at a lover with a weak smile. "You taste exactly as I remember."

Izaya smirked. "And now it's time for me to give you pleasure, my love."

Masaomi helped his lover undress him and obediently let Izaya position him on his hands and knees on the couch. He cried out as he was slammed into without preparation. He wasn't given time to adjust, and he bit into his now bleeding lip while the man thrusted at a rough pace. If the hand gently rubbing his lower back was supposed to make him feel better, it certainly didn't. Caught off-balance by a hard thrust, Masaomi fell forward onto his forearms, shuddering as Izaya curled his body against him. Masaomi moved his hips the right amount, moaned regularly, and forced himself to pant. In the end, he finished first, Izaya following soon afterwards. He collapsed onto his side, closing his eyes.

Izaya zipped his pants and sat down next to Masaomi. He flinched when his ass was touched, and blushed when he felt two fingers poking at the hole that was leaking out cum. It seemed that the man now liked to tease him after he'd released. He was licked, stroked, and prodded, and not given relief for quite a long time. On this occasion, Izaya decided to use his fingers to rub the boy's prostate, chuckling at the noises and body movements the action caused.

Just when Masaomi felt that he would climax again, the stimulation was taken away, and he was left of the edge, so close to bliss. He groaned quietly, but he knew better than to argue with Izaya's after-sex activities. He was brought to the edge multiple times, each making him more desperate for release. After a while, Izaya apparently became horny again. Masaomi knew this because he was flipped onto his stomach and pulled to his knees before being entered by something larger than fingers. There was no rhythm; Izaya just brushed back and forth against his prostate with different speeds and strength. As he had before, Izaya ceased all contact right before Masaomi could orgasm. He whimpered quietly as his body trembled from the need to release. He didn't speak; nothing he said would make Izaya stop playing with Masaomi's body for his own enjoyment. The teasing lasted about two or three hours, with Izaya finishing three times.

When he was finally able to climax, the feeling, as always, overwhelmed him. He looked into the eyes of his lover as he fainted.

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><p>About a week after he'd been taken home from the hospital, Masaomi decided to do what was fair for both of them. He left the bedroom that morning and timidly walked over to Izaya's desk.<p>

"Izaya, there's something I've really been meaning to talk about with you…"

The informant turned to Masaomi and smiled in a way that somehow seemed to hold no emotion. "What is it, darling?"

Masaomi looked down and played with his fingers. "I think…we should break up," he said quietly, his voice shaky.

Surprisingly, Izaya maintained his cool demeanor. "Why's that?" He leaned back in his seat and placed his arms on the armrests.

"Well…" Kida slowly looked up. "I don't feel what I did before. Well, I feel like…I don't love you now. I don't know what changed, but being with you doesn't make me as happy as it once did."

Izaya stood up and walked towards his lover, pulling him into a hug. "I think that you're just overwhelmed by everything changing. You just need to get used to our relationship; I'm sure that you'll feel love for me again in time."

"Okay…"

Izaya's hand slid down Masaomi's back and groped his ass, kneading softly. "Maybe being more physical will help you along, huh?"

Masaomi wrapped his arms around Izaya's neck and jumped onto him, his heart racing as he was carried up the stairs. Clothes flew everywhere and limbs tangled as they went at each other like animals. Masaomi sat up to catch his breath and watched as Izaya straddled his lap and nuzzled into his neck. He felt a familiar pleasant feeling, and he smiled as he hugged the man, trailing his fingers up and down his back because he now felt that he could freely do so. When he reached his lover's tailbone, a sudden image flashed into his mind that made him moan. His heart racing faster than before, he kneaded the man's ass, waiting for a reaction. He was surprised to hear a moan.

Slowly, cautiously, Masaomi's hand moved inwards until it was between Izaya's cheeks. He felt his lover tense slightly, but was relieved when he felt him relax. Moving even slower than before, Masaomi's middle finger ran along Izaya's skin from his testicles to his tailbone, and back again. After doing this a few times and feeling hot air against his neck, he focused his rubbing near Izaya's hole.

"Izaya, now that we're dating, equals, there's something I want to try. Can I?" Izaya didn't respond, but he kissed Masaomi's neck multiple times in an encouraging manner. Masaomi figured that pride was keeping the man from speaking. He grabbed lube off the nightstand and thoroughly coated three of his fingers. He circled Izaya's entrance with his finger, making sure that Izaya was fully aware of what he wanted to do. There was no resistance, so he slowly inserted the finger into the virgin hole, rubbing his lover's back as he felt him tense. He inserted a second finger even slower than before. Once they were both in, he started to move them in and out and slowly scissored them. He did his best to not seem patronizing as he made soothing noises and continued to stroke his back. After a few minutes, he removed his fingers and laid Izaya on his back, bending and spreading his legs while he coated his member with lubricant.

Masaomi gently touched the arm covering Izaya's flushed face. "Izaya, can I please see your face? I want this to be an intimate experience, so I'd really like to look at you." He smiled when the blushing face was revealed. "You look beautiful with that expression." Masaomi held Izaya's hand and kissed his cheek. "I'm going to start now. I'll go slow at first." He slowly entered his lover, moaning in pleasure at the tight warmth he was greeted with. He stilled when it was all the way in order to look at Izaya. When he picked up a slow pace, he touched Izaya's cheek. "Does this feel okay? Should I go slower?" The boy frowned when he wasn't answered. "Please talk to me," he said in a soft voice. "I want this to feel good for both of us, so I need you to tell me how you're feeling."

Hesitantly, Izaya looked up at Masaomi, blushing, not used to being submissive. "You can go faster. It doesn't really hurt anymore."

Masaomi smiled and locked Izaya in a kiss as he moved faster, rolling his hips. When the man inhaled sharply and tightened around him, he moved in the same way, angling his thrusts, knowing he'd found his partner's prostate. "How does—?"

He was cut off by a forceful kiss. Izaya's fingers tangled in his hair as he moaned into the boy's mouth. Masaomi smiled into the kiss and moved faster. He pulled away after a few dizzying minutes. "Izaya, should I finish inside or outside."

"O-outside, please." This was embarrassing enough for him. Having to clean out his lover's release from that area sounded humiliating, even if he would be doing it alone.

Masaomi nodded. After a few more thrusts, Izaya arched his back and cried out as he climaxed, looking at his lover with lidded eyes.

Kida moaned at the feeling of the informant's walls contracting around him. He held back until Izaya had come down from his orgasm, and then pulled out, spilling onto his lover's stomach. He immediately moved to grab a towel from the nightstand and cleaned his lover off. After that, he collapsed onto his side and guided Izaya to do the same. He smiled and hugged him. "Thank you for letting me do that. I… I love you." He meant it, too. The connection was back, and he felt as passionate as ever about his lover. "I love you so much, Izaya," he said happily.

"I love you too." Izaya hugged him back, still a bit stunned that he'd just allowed that to happen. But he loved Masaomi, and he wanted the boy to be content with him. He moved them under the covers and held Kida close. "Let's take a nap, hm?"

Masaomi nodded, still overjoyed that his feelings had returned. "That sounds great." He quickly drifted off in his lover's arms with a soft smile.


	3. Chapter 3

_Ugh, I'm dealing with some serious writer's block right now, so I apologize for the lack of updates and the shortness of this chapter (and the previous ones). Hopefully my creativity will return soon._

* * *

><p>The event was never mentioned. Izaya hadn't said a word about it, and Masaomi was afraid to bring it up. Everything seemed normal enough. Right after Masaomi had topped, they cuddled, took a nap, and showered. They ate dinner together and fell asleep in their bed, the blond held tightly in his lover's arms. Nothing had changed. Except for Kida regaining his feelings for the man, the days went by as they always did, with work, sex, meals together, and various activities like playing chess, watching movies, or going for a walk in the park.<p>

About a week had passed, and the younger male started to grow restless, wanting to know if his brief period of dominance would become regularity, or if it was a one-time thing. Eventually, he was no longer able to hold in his curiosity.

As Izaya loomed over him, sucking on his neck, Masaomi placed his hands on Izaya's rear and slowly massaged his cheeks. There was no sign of resistance, so he cautiously moved a hand inwards, sliding a finger onto his perineum.

Izaya twitched and hastily brushed the hands away. He pulled away to look at Masaomi with an unreadable expression. "Excuse me. What do you thing you're doing?"

Masaomi blushed heatedly. "U-um, I just thought that…after that one day last week… The day that I, you know, topped—"

"I'd rather not talk about that," Izaya cut in, his voice cold and his gaze icy. "Ever," he finished with emphasis.

"Well, I know that this is kind of an embarrassing thing to talk about, but I need to know what you're comfortable with in the future. How often—?"

Izaya clenched his teeth. "I said that I don't want to talk about it." His voice was even colder than before.

The younger male sighed and reached up to touch his lover's hair, hoping to get through to him somehow. "We're equals now, right? We're in a relationship. Doesn't that mean we should also be equal in the bedroom?"

"Do not disobey me!" Izaya slapped Masaomi's cheek, and then slapped his other cheek with the back of his hand, glaring into fearful chestnut eyes. "When I tell you that I don't want to discuss a certain topic, I expect you to respect that," he seethed. "This kind of behavior is unacceptable."

Masaomi dropped his hand and blinked away the tears that had welled up in his eyes from the pain. Was that okay to accept? Izaya had slapped him before, but it seemed different now that they were dating. Not sure what else to do, he stared into red eyes silently, trying not to look hurt. He was surprised when soft eyes smiled at him. In the past, Izaya would give him that look after being punished. Masaomi fell into their old routine.

"I'm sorry. I won't mention it again."

"That's a good boy," the older male said as he cupped the boy's cheek. He softly rubbed it with his thumb when Masaomi leaned into the touch. "Remember that you'll always be treated well when you behave." He kissed his lover's nose, and then pressed their foreheads together.

"Thank you," Masaomi said quietly. His uneasiness faded away as he regressed deeper into how their relationship used to be. He closed his eyes and waited to be touched. Sure enough, Izaya's fingers skimmed his abdomen down to his thigh, stroking it softly. He obediently opened his mouth when the man's tongue met his lips, and submissively followed his slow rhythm, intoxicated by his lover's taste. Masaomi was breathless when Izaya pulled away.

"You look tired; take a nap. I have some important things to attend to, anyway."

Masaomi's fingers touched the man's arm when he dressed and left the bed. "Will you lie with me?" His stomach dropped at the look he was given. "W-when you're done with your work, of course. Please? I love you…" The last phrase was said almost too quietly to hear.

Izaya smiled sweetly. "Sure. I'll be back in an hour."

Masaomi closed his eyes, drifting off with a content expression as his lover closed the door.

* * *

><p>Izaya soundlessly entered his bedroom and slipped beneath the covers. He scooted towards the boy lying on his side and gently ran his hand along the curves of his body. In the past, he would often watch or touch Masaomi while he slept. His lover would wake up with a light blush and weak smile. He liked the way things used to be, and didn't see a need to change something he enjoyed.<p>

Izaya kissed Masaomi's forehead, and then grazed the ass of the deep sleeper, his hand sliding along the inner thigh that was exposed to him. His fingers dipped between his cheeks and stroked back and forth from his tailbone to his testicles. Frowning slightly at how many things could unknowingly be done to Masaomi while he slept, he returned his hand to his rear, resting it there as he licked and nibbled on the blond's neck. The bites grew harder when a hand buried itself in his hair and a moan escaped his lover.

"Nnnghh, Izaya~." He whimpered when the contact stopped, wanting to pull the head closer, but knowing that he might be reprimanded for it.

"Did you have a nice nap?"

Masaomi made a noise that expressed agreement. He opened his eyes and smiled at the face in front of him. Nuzzling into the man's chest, he said happily, "Izaya."

Izaya chuckled. "You're so cute. I love you."

Masaomi closed his eyes again and smiled wider. "I love you too."

"What would you like to do for dinner tonight?" He idly twirled strands of the blond hair between his fingers.

"What are my choices?" Masaomi asked, excited to be able to choose.

"Hmm… We haven't really gone on an actual 'date' yet, so I could take you out to an upscale restaurant, we could cook dinner together and make a night out of it, or we could order in and watch a movie or something. It's your choice."

Masaomi moved closer to Izaya, resting his chin on his chest so he could look up at him. "Can we eat in bed and watch a movie? I want to cuddle."

"Sure." He kissed the top of Kida's head. "You want to order in, then? What would you like? I'll drive over to pick it up, so try to choose a place near here…" Izaya frowned and patted Masaomi's back. "Hey, why are you crying?"

The boy hid his face in Izaya's chest, hugging him tightly. "I'm just so happy to be with you." He sniffled. "This is so amazing. I love being with you. My life is…perfect."

Izaya smiled. He grabbed Masaomi's arms and dragged him up the bed so the boy's face was across from his. "I love being with you too. I love _you_, Masa-chan."

The younger male blushed at the nickname, but didn't protest. "I love you too…" He tried to come up with some kind of nickname, but was unable to think of one that the informant wouldn't mind being called. After a while, he finally decided to try one. "Zaya," he said, looking at Izaya intently, waiting for approval. He relaxed when the man simply smiled in return.

"So, what do you want to eat?"

"Umm… I don't really know. You can choose—you know what I like."

"Okay." Izaya sat up. "You look like you're going to fall asleep again. Do you want to rest until I come back with the food? That way, you're less likely to fall asleep during the movie."

Masaomi nodded. "Sure. Thanks, Zaya." He blushed again when his lover kissed his cheek and tucked him in a second time. "I love you."

"I love you too, Masaomi."

* * *

><p>Masaomi woke up to the feeling of his face being showered by kisses. He opened his eyes to see Izaya looming over him with a smirk. "Hello there, gorgeous. Are you ready for our lovely date?"<p>

Kida stretched his arms and yawned. "Yes, definitely." He sat up when Izaya left the bed. The man returned after grabbing the food, sitting next to him, and placing their meals on either side of them. Masaomi scooted closer to the informant and opened his bag of food. "Yummy, tofu udon." He opened his mouth when asked, and ate the piece of sashimi placed in it. "Ootoro, of course. You haven't changed at all." He snuggled closer, smiling contently when an arm wrapped around his waist. "What movie are we going to watch?"

"Let's check the television to see if there's anything on." He grabbed the remote and flipped through the channels, setting it on the bedside table when he found a good movie. "Do you like horror movies?"

"W-well, I get scared of them kind of easily…" His hands shook as he nervously shoved food into his mouth.

Izaya pulled the boy closer. "Well, good thing you have your strong, fearless boyfriend to protect you from scary monsters." He chuckled and kissed Masaomi's temple.

The younger male relaxed a bit. "Y-yeah… This is fine, then." He ate at a slower pace, finishing everything in about ten minutes. After Izaya removed the trash from the bed, he climbed between the man's legs, resting his back against the informant's chest. He pulled the blankets up when his boyfriend wrapped his arms around his waist. "I feel…really safe like this."

"I'm glad you feel safe in my arms. I'll always protect my darling Masa-chan."

Kida yelped when something popped up on the screen. He turned his head away and held on to one of the informant's arms. "This is really scary." He moved around, trying to get as close to Izaya as possible. Shaking, he let out a quiet whimper. "Like, _really_ scary."

Izaya held Masaomi tighter, nuzzling into the top of his head. "It's just a movie, sweetheart. There's nothing to fear—especially when you're with me."

Masaomi looked up and smiled weakly. "Okay…"

Figuring that the younger male wouldn't become comfortable with the movie on, Izaya changed it to an action movie that he knew Masaomi liked.

"You didn't have to change it for me. Don't turn it off for my sake."

"It's all right. I like this one, as well." He smiled as Masaomi relaxed, sinking into his arms. "You're adorable, Masa-chan."

The blond blushed. "Izaya…" He looked up and pulled the man's face down to his, kissing him gently. He smiled into the kiss, letting his lover set a slow, intoxicating rhythm. Masaomi moaned quietly, loving the feeling of Izaya's tongue in his mouth and his fingers grazing his outer thigh. He felt content, the fear from earlier completely gone as he melted into his lover's warm embrace. "I love you," he said breathlessly between kisses.

"I love you too." Izaya deepened the kiss, but kept the same slow, sensual rhythm.

Masaomi's breath caught when one of Izaya's hands found its way into his boxers. He moaned quietly as two fingers moved inside him, curling and stretching. He opened his legs wider to make the ministrations easier. Once he did, the fingers gave him overwhelming pleasure. His mouth fell open, no longer having the strength to continue with the kiss. He shut his eyes and breathed hot puffs of air against his lover's neck, arching his back when a third finger was added. Masaomi yelped when he was suddenly pushed forward. His boxers were pulled down and a body pinned him to the bed. "I-Izaya?" He yelped again when a large object penetrated him and immediately started to move. "A-ah, what's with this position?" He grew uneasy when the man above him remained silent, thrusting into him with complete composure. "I-Izaya…?" Masaomi cried out when his lover slammed into his prostate, causing him to climax. Izaya didn't stop after Masaomi had finished, and a few tears escaped him. "Izaya, you're really scaring me. P-please say something."

Izaya flipped the boy over and picked up a faster pace, locking their lips together and letting out a few moans.

Masaomi relaxed when Izaya responded to him. He wrapped his arms around the man and moved his hips against the thrusts, wanting to give him the same pleasure he'd experienced. Sure enough, Izaya pulled out a few moments later and released onto his stomach. He caught his breath as he was cleaned up.

The blond smiled happily as he was pulled onto Izaya's lap, purring as his back was stroked and his face and neck were showered with kisses. "This is so wonderful. Thank you for taking care of me, Izaya."

"I'm glad to do it. I love you, after all."

Masaomi closed his eyes and rested his head on Izaya's shoulder. "I love you too."

"Now, why don't you do something to please me, huh?"

Kida looked at his lover and blinked. "Um, like, you want me to suck you off?"

Izaya's mouth twitched. "Charming, but no. I'm not talking about stimulation, but it can be something sexual in nature. I'm bored; entertain me."

Masaomi blushed. "W-well, if you get me drunk enough, I'll give you a lap dance. Even though I'm dating you now, it's still too embarrassing to do while sober."

"Hm, possibly. Give me some other options."

"Okay…" He tapped his chin as he thought. "We could play a party game like Truth or Dare, Never Have I Ever, or Two Truths and One Lie… Or I could put on those cat ears in the closet and act like a kitten." He blushed at how easily the last one rolled off his tongue. Remembering something, he looked down at his abdomen. "You could mark me again," he said quietly.

"Those things sound nice. We'll have to do all of them at some point. The last one sounds particularly intriguing." Izaya's fingers grazed the scar of his name on Masaomi's body. "Do you mean that you want me to trace over it or make a mark in a different place?"

Masaomi shuddered under the informant's touch. "Well, either, I guess. If you can think of another place, that's fine."

Izaya touched a spot low on Masaomi's back. "Here?"

"Sure…" His heart raced as he recalled the first time Izaya had carved his name into his body.

"Okay; lie on your stomach. I'll get a sterile knife, a bandage, and such." He left the bed to collect the necessary things, leaving his nervous lover alone.

Masaomi's heart nearly stopped as he felt his boyfriend straddle his legs and rub a spot low on the left side of his back. The mark would be on the opposite side of his body from where the other was.

"I'm going to start now."

"O-okay." He rested his forehead on his arms and closed his eyes, doing his best to relax.

The pain was excruciating, just as it had been before. He cried out, and then whimpered, his body trembling from the pain. He did his best to stay still when he felt a hand pushing on him, attempting to stop him from shaking too much. Not wanting to make Izaya mess up, the boy clenched his teeth and balled his fists, trying to block out the pain by thinking of how erotic the act was. It somewhat worked, and he was able to focus on that for the remainder of the experience, progressively calming down and relaxing. He let out a deep exhale when it was over, his breathing returning to normal and his heart beating at its normal pace as his wound was cleaned and bandaged.

Izaya lay beside his lover, rubbing his upper back and pulling the covers over them. He pecked Masaomi's lips and grabbed his hand, playing with his fingers. "And now you're mine forever."

Masaomi smiled softly. "Again."

"Yes, again. Not that you really needed a reminder." Izaya shifted Masaomi onto his side so they were facing each other, and then brushed through the blond hair with his fingers. "You'll never escape me. No matter how far you run, I'll always bring you back home, where you belong."

Masaomi threw an arm over the older male. "I'll never want to escape. It feels nice to belong somewhere—to some_one_. All my life, I never felt like I fit in. I tried so hard to be liked by my peers. It worked, but I was still unhappy, because I wasn't being who I really was. I was just putting on a show. I don't have to do that with you. You love me like I am, despite my fucked up personality and ridiculous amount of both petty and serious problems. So… Thank you, Izaya. Thank you for loving me."

Izaya pulled the boy closer. "I think you're absolutely perfect. All of your flaws and assets combine to create a beautiful person. You're the most interesting person I've ever met, and I'm excited to spend the rest of my life with someone so perfect."

Masaomi blushed. A single tear left him as he hugged his lover tightly. "Thank you. I've never been this happy. I'll love you forever and ever, and I'll always stay with you."

Izaya smiled, holding the boy in a warm, protective embrace. "I'll always take care of you."


	4. Chapter 4

Masaomi swung his legs back and forth as he sat on the informant's desk. "So, what are we going to do today?"

"_I_ am going to work. You may do anything that does not distract me from it," Izaya said in a flat, but not quite cold, voice, not looking away from his laptop.

"You're not going to be working _all day_, though, right? We can spend time together when you're finished?" Masaomi stopped swinging his legs. He knew that he should end the conversation as soon as possible, so Izaya didn't become angry with him for speaking after he'd been told to let him work without distraction.

Izaya sighed. "Yes, we can do something of your choosing when I finish."

"Yay~!" Masaomi bit his lip. "Just, ah, one more little question…" he said timidly. "When will you be finished?" He nervously played with his fingers when Izaya stopped what he was doing to look at him.

"Around three or four hours. I'm going to return to my work now. Please don't disturb me."

Masaomi smiled brightly. He pecked Izaya's cheek, and then walked towards the couch cheerfully. "Great! I'll leave you alone now." He flopped down on the couch and pulled out the new phone Izaya had bought him. He plugged in headphones and listened to music as he played with some of the free apps he'd downloaded. After a while, he switched to the playlist of Izaya's classical music that the informant had added to his library. He fell asleep a few minutes later, dreaming of dancing to the music with his boyfriend.

When he woke up a few hours later, he found his head on someone's lap and his hair being petted. He smiled and closed his eyes, content. "Izaya~."

The man smiled. He placed Masaomi's phone on the table, turned on some classical music that played throughout the apartment, and pulled the boy up. He placed one of the teen's hands on his shoulder and placed his own on the blond's waist. He held Kida's other hand and moved in a slow circle.

Masaomi instinctively followed the informant's steps, blushing. "Wh-what's this about?"

Izaya kissed Masaomi's forehead and moved with slightly more advanced steps, still moving slow so his partner could catch on to it. "You talk in your sleep, you know. Earlier, you expressed your wish of dancing with me. I figured that you'd be too embarrassed to ask for this, so I decided to initiate and save you the trouble of keeping it hidden or feeling embarrassed by asking."

Masaomi looked up at his lover with gleaming brown eyes. "Thank you, Izaya. This is really such a sweet gesture. I appreciate that you're willing to do these romantic things with me."

Izaya moved a bit faster. "You make it sound like I see romance as some kind of chore. I'm the one that suggested we be in a romantic relationship, wasn't I? I enjoy doing these kinds of activities with you—things that bring us closer as a couple."

Masaomi smiled. He wrapped both arms around Izaya's neck and rested his head on the man's chest. He was silent, smiling as he closed his eyes and moved with his lover.

"The other day, you said that we're 'equals' now that we're in a romantic relationship. Does it bother you that I don't see it that way—that I don't treat you much differently than I did when we were just having sex?"

Masaomi opened his eyes and turned his head, staring off at nowhere in particular as he considered the question. "I wish that we could be equals, but I'm still happy being in a relationship with you. I'd be happier if you didn't act so dominant all the time, but that's not a necessity, since I love you so much, and want to be with you. I was happy with this kind of treatment before, so putting a label on what 'we' are shouldn't change things much."

Izaya smirked. "Wonderful. I'm glad to hear that. Now, why don't you repay me for this kind gesture." He broke their embrace and turned off the music, taking a step back.

"Of course, dear." The boy smiled happily. "Where?"

"On the couch. Show me your body."

Kida removed all of his clothing. He sat down on the couch, facing Izaya. He put his feet on the chair and spread his legs so his lover would have a full view of his lower parts. A pink blush covered his cheeks. "L-like this?"

"Yes, perfect." Izaya sat down and turned Masaomi to face him again, positioning the boy so his back leaned against the couch arm. "Touch yourself."

Masaomi's blush deepened as he coated his fingers with saliva and shoved two inside of him. He moved them at a slow pace, just barely brushing against his prostate. "Nnhh… Izaya. Are we going to have sex?"

"Certainly. I'm going to make love to you today, instead of fucking you." Izaya stood up and offered Masaomi his hand.

The younger male removed his fingers and grabbed the man's hand with his clean one. Once he stood, the informant led them to the bedroom. He smiled bashfully when he was scooped up and placed on the bed, blushing deeply when the man climbed on top of him and rubbed their noses together.

"Do you like it better when I'm affectionate or rough during sex?" Izaya asked as he dragged his fingers up and down Masaomi's side.

"Well—" Kida studied his lover's eyes, and then opened his mouth to ask his own question. He was cut off before he could say anything.

"Yes, I want your honest answer, not what you think I want to hear, and there will be no negative repercussions."

Masaomi nodded, not questioning how the older male could tell what he'd planned to ask. "Umm, I like it better when you're affectionate. I-I love your mind more than your body, and I like romantic intimacy better than the sexual kind." He bit his lip, once again gazing into the man's eyes, looking for a reaction.

"I see…" Izaya leaned down and placed gentle kisses on his lover's neck. He laced their fingers together.

"Wh-what do you think of that? I know you've said before that you like having sex better than doing most other things with me, so…" Masaomi trailed off awkwardly, looking away, feeling insecure.

"I think that you've had sex with many people, and you enjoy the loving attention of someone that you care for. That's completely normal, and I don't consider it a bad thing. I love you, you know, and I'll give you the affection that you crave," Izaya said as he pulled his member out and coated it in lube.

Masaomi smiled weakly. "Thank you," he mumbled quietly. "I love you too." He reached up and combed through the soft black hair. "I'm so happy to be with you." He widened his eyes and yelped when Izaya suddenly thrusted inside of him, immediately picking up a fast pace. His eyes watered. "I-Izaya, that's…too fast! It hurts!"

Izaya didn't slow down, but instead gently stroked Masaomi's legs, arms, and torso, sweetly kissing his neck. "You had your fingers in there a few minutes ago. That should be enough preparation."

Kida sniffled and blinked away his tears. Izaya wasn't big on preparation. Everything else in his life was carefully planned out, but sex was spontaneous and rough. "Y-you said you…hah…were going to m-make love to me."

"We'll do that another time. I'm too horny for gentle sex."

Masaomi's face sunk, but he didn't argue. "O-okay. But, um, do you mind slowing down just a bit? Only for a minute or two."

Izaya made an annoyed grunt. "You'll adjust soon."

"We haven't had sex in a few days, though. I c-can feel it tearing." His eyes watered once again, and this time he was unable to keep a tear from escaping.

Izaya pulled his lips into a straight line. He flipped Masaomi over, pulled him to his knees, and moved at a slightly slower pace. "Why are you so sensitive suddenly? You used to be fine with this."

"I d-don't really know," Masaomi said as he squirmed around, attempting and failing at getting into a position where his chest and the side of his face weren't pushed against the bed, "but it's still hurting. You didn't give me time to adjust."

"God, this is so obnoxious. Your complaining is a real turn-off, you know."

Masaomi frowned. He wanted to yell at his lover that he had a say in what happened to his body, but that probably wouldn't end well—most likely with cuts and bruises. "Sorry," he eventually said. He bit his lip to hold back whimpers, waiting for Izaya to position his hips so he would also experience pleasure.

That time never came. Izaya released a few moments later, continuing to slam into the boy until he'd gone fully limp. He rubbed the younger male's back and then pulled out. "That would have been a lot better for you if you had _tried_ to feel pleasure. Sex has a lot to do with the mind."

"I can't feel pleasure when I'm being torn apart from the inside," Masaomi mumbled.

"Excuse me? What did you say?"

"Nothing…"

Izaya patted Masaomi's head and left the bed, zipping up his pants and heading towards the bedroom door.

Kida finally decided that it was time to say something. "You really hurt me," he said quietly.

The informant turned around. "Hm?"

"I'm bleeding and in pain, and you're just going to leave me here like this. _You_ did this to me, but you're making _me_ take care of the aftermath. I mean, what was that? You just used me so you could get off, and didn't even try to make me feel good. That's not how relationships work." He sat up and stared at the man with a serious expression. "I get that you want to have power over me in this relationship, and I can accept that, but I want you to treat me with some respect. I'm not just something to play with."

Izaya crossed his arms and leaned back against the wall. "Are you done now?"

Masaomi blinked. "Wh-what?"

"Are you finished with your little speech?" His face showed no emotion.

Kida looked at the man incredulously. "Don't you have something to say to that? Aren't you going to tell me that you'll try to treat me better?"

"I will if you want me to lie."

Masaomi balled his fists. "Do you not see anything wrong with what you just did?"

"Not particularly. We had consensual sex, and now I'm going to continue on with my day."

"It was consensual, but you treated me poorly. I can't believe you!" Masaomi stood up, only to crumple to the ground, placing a hand on his back in pain. He snapped his head up, horrified when he heard laughter. "What's so funny about this?"

Izaya grabbed his stomach and slowly calmed down from his laughing fit. "I fucked you so hard that you can't stand. That's the most clichéd thing ever."

"I can't walk, and you're just laughing at my pain? I can't deal with this—I _won't_ deal with this. Come over here and help me!"

Izaya took a few steps towards Masaomi and bent at the waist. "I don't take orders from brats."

Masaomi didn't back down. "Help me! You did this, so fix it! All I'm asking for is a little bit of care after you were so cruel to me! I don't care how much of a selfish, narcissistic asshole you are. Take care of your boyfriend!"

Izaya kicked Masaomi in the stomach, making him fall onto his back, his head hitting the ground with a loud thud. "Don't tell me what to do." He grabbed Masaomi's ankle and dragged him into the bathroom. "Everything you need to take care of your pain is in here. Crawl downstairs if you need an icepack." He started to walk away.

"Please don't leave me." Masaomi looked at his lover with teary eyes when the man turned around. "I'm in so much pain. Please just wipe me off and carry me to the bed," he said quietly. "I won't ask for anything more."

Izaya sighed. "See? You can get what you want if you ask nicely instead of giving orders." He placed Masaomi in a seated position leaning against the bathtub and used a wipe to clean the blood and semen off his lower parts. Once that was finished, he scooped the boy into his arms and carried him to the bed. He stripped to his boxers, put boxers on Masaomi, and climbed in next to his lover, pulling him into a hug, cuddling with him.

Tears streamed down Masaomi's face and he let out quiet sobs as he was embraced. He wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and cried into his chest. "I love y-you so much…a-and I know that means I might be mi…serable because it w-would take a lot for me to leave you, which m-means tha…t you can pretty much t-treat me however you want a-and I'll still…stay." He took a few deep breaths to calm down. "I want you to treat me like an equal, but I can't control you. I'm powerless against you. You have all of the power in this relationship."

Izaya soothingly stroked Masaomi's hair as he pulled the covers onto them, noticing that the boy was cold. "I know all of that. I love you, Masaomi, but you should realize that I can't be the ideal boyfriend of your dreams; my personality doesn't allow it. However, I dislike seeing you in so much emotional distress, and I can see that my behavior is the cause of that. We will never be on equal terms, but I'll try harder to treat you with love and respect. I understand that what I did earlier was rather cruel, and I shouldn't have lost my temper from you asking me to slow down. Being sexually frustrated isn't an excuse for making you endure so much pain. I'm… I'm sorry, Masaomi. I love you so much."

Masaomi started to sob again. "I love you t-too. Thank you f-for taking care of me."

"Hush, now. Let's take a nice, long nap together, huh?"

Kida moved his head back to look at Izaya. "O-okay." He smiled as he was kissed gently, and then nuzzled into his boyfriend's neck, quickly drifting off, feeling safe and loved in Izaya's arms.

* * *

><p>Masaomi woke up with a large smile, happy that his lover had remained by his side so he could wake up next to him. His smile widened when he felt a hand move against his back.<p>

"Good morning, gorgeous. How did you sleep?"

Masaomi blushed. "Very well. Is it really morning, though? It was barely evening when we went to bed."

"Yes, it's about 9:00. You were exhausted, and slept the whole time. I left the bed about an hour or two after we fell asleep, and then returned around 12:00. You're so cute when you sleep, you know. You make the most adorable expressions."

The boy's blush deepened. "Thank you…"

"Do you want to make breakfast together?"

Masaomi's eyes gleamed. "Yes! That sounds amazing!" he said happily, careful not to yell since they were so close together. He laughed giddily.

Izaya kissed Masaomi's nose. "Let's make some pancakes. I know they're your favorite." He left the bed and threw on a t-shirt. "Can you walk?"

The blond stepped out of bed. "Yes, but my back still has a dull ache. It's barely noticeable, though." He smiled brightly. "Nothing could stop me from the opportunity to make pancakes with Orihara Izaya. That's something I never thought I'd be able to do."

Izaya helped Masaomi into a shirt, and then ruffled his hair. "Let's go." He turned and squatted down. "Hop on."

"Really? This day is awesome!" Masaomi wrapped his arms and legs around the informant, giggling as he was carried downstairs and into the kitchen.

"I want to make up for my behavior yesterday." He placed the boy on his feet and got out the necessary ingredients. "I'll take a break from work and we can spend the day together."

Masaomi helped Izaya make the food, glancing at him every once in a while, admiring his features and the way he moved. "So, what are we going to do, then?"

Izaya shrugged. "I don't know yet. I'd like to stay in today, but besides that, you can choose. Can you get out the syrup, whipped cream, blueberries, and strawberries, please?"

Kida nodded and placed the items on the counter next to their plates. He started to make them both coffee, as well. "Wow, this is going to be the best day ever. I get to spend time with the one I love, doing things of my choosing, for hours? This is a dream come true." He hugged Izaya's side. "I love you so much."

Izaya kissed the top of Masaomi's head. "I love you too, darling. Everything is ready. Let's eat." He dished everything up and put them on the table, eating his meal once Masaomi sat down next to him.

Kida also ate, glancing at the informant every once in a while with a subtle smile. His smile faded when Izaya took a phone call about something that sounded problematic and urgent. His thoughts were confirmed when the man stood up and kissed the top of his head.

"Sorry, darling, I have to go out for a few hours. This is really important. We'll spend time together when I get home, okay?"

Masaomi blinked away tears and avoided Izaya's eyes. "This was supposed to be our time together. Can't someone else take care of it?" Very quietly, he added, "Is this job more important than me?"

Izaya sighed. "Masaomi, don't be like that. I have to work to support us. Our living expenses are quite high. I'll only be gone for a few hours. We'll do whatever you want when I get home." He left the kitchen to put on his shoes and coat. "Only call me if it's an emergency." He moved to leave, but stopped when he felt something latch on to his arm.

"Please don't leave." A few tears escaped Masaomi as he hugged Izaya's arm tightly. "Stay with me."

Izaya rubbed his forehead. "Masaomi, I'm not going to change my mind no matter how much you cry and beg. I have to do this job myself."

"Then bring me with you."

"You'd slow me down. Release my arm so I can go."

Masaomi shook his head and closed his eyes, holding on tighter.

Izaya sighed again. "Masaomi, don't make me hurt you." When the boy still refused, he roughly pulled on the blonde hair, forcing Kida to look at him. "_Let go_," he seethed, "_or you will be punished_." There was no response yet again, so the informant punched Masaomi's stomach. The painful surprise made the boy release his arm, so he grabbed his wrists and looked at him with a stern expression. "I'm not going to punish you. When I return this evening, we'll do whatever you want." He smiled and kissed Masaomi briefly. "I'll miss you. Goodbye, darling. I love you."

The blond obediently kissed the man back. He sniffled as he listened to his lover speak, nodding with a weak smile when he finished. "I love you too." When he was alone, he cleaned up their meal, and then collapsed onto the couch, thinking of activities to do with his boyfriend, completely forgetting about how upset he'd been just a few minutes ago. After about an hour of thinking, he fell asleep, smiling as he dreamed about all the wonderful things he'd do with his lover later that night.


	5. Chapter 5

Masaomi opened his eyes to find his head on someone's lap, his hair twirling around nimble fingers.

"Have you been asleep since I left?"

Masaomi didn't answer. He sat up and pulled his legs to his chest, wrapping his arms around them. He leaned to his left, resting against Izaya's body. "I'm unhappy," he said quietly. "I don't like the way you're treating me, but I feel like I'm powerless against you. You ignore me, treat me roughly when I ask you to be gentle, and hurt me physically and emotionally. Do you really think this is a healthy relationship?"

"No." Izaya wrapped an arm around Masaomi's waist. "I have a lot of power over you, and you don't have the will to leave me, therefore, allowing me to do as I please with the knowledge that you'll stay by my side. You've given me this power, Masaomi. If you want our relationship to change, you'll have to figure out how I gained this power, and how you can take some of it back."

Masaomi frowned and closed his eyes, resting his head on his boyfriend's shoulder. "Why can't you just tell me? Why do I have to struggle to be treated well if you know the answer to letting me have that?"

"You won't grow if I tell you how to do everything. You have to learn these things for yourself."

Masaomi scoffed. "What, so you're my dad now?"

"I see myself as a type of guardian figure to you. You're still young and naïve, and I'm an adult you look up to and seek out for comfort and problem resolution."

"My guardian…" He let out a shaky exhale. "Do you really love me?"

"Yes, I love you very much," Izaya said evenly.

"In a romantic sense?"

"Yes, that's right."

Masaomi opened his eyes, but remained still. "I don't believe you."

"Am I supposed to do something to reassure you of my feelings now?" Izaya asked, sounding more intrigued than annoyed.

"As my boyfriend, you're supposed to do what you can to let me know that your feelings for me are honest and strong. I feel like you're using me for my body and appeasing me by giving me affection."

The informant stroked Masaomi's hair. "I see… Well, I let you down today, so I'll play along. What to do…" Izaya was silent for a while, thinking. Then he grasped Masaomi's chin and turned it towards him. He stared deeply into light brown eyes. "_I love you_," he said with determination, his voice steady and his gaze unwavering. He dropped his hand when Masaomi smiled.

"Okay, I believe you." He crawled onto his boyfriend's lap and rested his forehead on Izaya's chest. "I love you too."

Masaomi's eyes opened and his smile faded when a hand slid beneath his waistband. He shivered when he felt a tongue and hot breath against his ear. "I-Izaya, I'm really tired. Can we go to bed?"

"Soon," the informant murmured.

Kida whimpered when a thumb circled the tip of his hardening member. "I just want to go to bed…please…" Masaomi buried his face in Izaya's shirt as a few tears slid down his face. He clutched onto his boyfriend's shoulders and sniffled.

Izaya took his hand away and hugged Masaomi securely, kissing the top of his head. "I won't touch you if you don't want me to."

"It's n-not that I don't…want you to. I just want you to ask first."

"I need to ask every time I want to touch you? I stopped when I realized you really wanted me to. I thought you were just being timid."

"Not every time. Read the mood, I guess…"

Izaya kissed Masaomi's head. "I understand." He slid his hand under his lover's shirt and rubbed his back. "Can I touch you?" he whispered.

Masaomi nodded slowly, feeling grateful that his request was granted. "Okay," he said quietly. "But don't be rough."

"I won't." Izaya parted his legs and placed Masaomi between them. He slowly undid his lover's pants and pulled them, with his boxers, down a bit. He stroked Masaomi's length and kissed his neck, his other hand rubbing his boyfriend's inner thigh. "We won't have sex at all tomorrow."

The younger male let out a quiet moan, watching the slender hands touch him. "Why not?"

"Because you don't like having sex with me."

"That's not—"

"You _prefer_ not to, is a better description, I suppose, or you'd _rather_ do something more…romantic. Of course you enjoy sex; you're a teenage boy with raging hormones. But lately, your libido has lowered significantly. Starting tomorrow, I won't touch you in a sexual way unless you initiate, and will keep that up until you tell me that you want me to start initiating again." He stroked faster and lightly nibbled on his earlobe.

"All right… Why, though? You said that I, alone, need to figure out how to change our relationship."

"I didn't mean _completely_ alone. I like the way things are, but I'll change the way I treat you if you can figure out how to do it. I enjoy playing with your mind and seeing how you react to certain situations, after all. This isn't a permanent arrangement. I'm merely giving you a false sense of power to put less stress on you and help you along. Having you sad and needy all the time isn't ideal for me, so I don't mind giving you some assistance. I want you to succeed in this."

Masaomi bit his lip as he collected his thoughts, finding it difficult to concentrate because of the amazing touches he was receiving. "Then w-what's ideal for you?"

"Not this. I'm interested to hear yours, though."

Masaomi didn't try to argue. He knew this was a tactic the man used to control the conversation, but he didn't mind. "I don't have a clear picture of it." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I don't really want us to be equals; I desire discipline and authority. However, I don't want to be treated like a toy to be played with, an inanimate object without a will or feelings. I desire intimacy and affection balanced with submitting to my partner for some things. I guess… I want to go back to the way things were before we were dating, except that now we'll confess our feelings freely, and I'll have a bit more say in our relationship and what happens to my body." Izaya suddenly stroked rapidly and roughly circled the tip with his thumb. He arched his back and climaxed silently, his eyes clouding with lust. When it was over, he was completely relaxed, his body feeling light as he rested against his lover.

Izaya grabbed tissues to clean off Masaomi and his hand. "That's attainable. I look forward to seeing how you go about making a better life for yourself." He pulled Masaomi's pants off all the way and put his boxers on. He scooped the boy up into his arms, placing the pants on Masaomi's lap. He returned the gesture when he was kissed, breaking away after a few seconds to carry his lover to the bed. Izaya took off his pants and joined his young lover under the sheets of their large bed.

Masaomi hugged Izaya loosely. "Do you want me to give you a blowjob?"

"I'd like that very much." He sat up and pulled his soft member out of the slit in his boxers.

Masaomi smiled at his boyfriend softly, and then lay on his stomach between the man's legs. He stroked the length until it hardened. "Should I suck and lick, or go straight to deep throating?"

Izaya ruffled Masaomi's hair. "Whichever you prefer is fine with me. It'll be a while until I cum if you only deep throat, though."

Kida nodded. He kissed the tip, and then sloppily licked all over the shaft, wetting it with his saliva. "Can you make noises? It encourages me and makes me feel better about my performance when you do." He smiled when he was answered positively, and returned to his task, sucking on the tip as his hand stroked the hardened member. He rubbed it against his tongue and cheek when he heard a shaky breath, and took it deep into his throat when he felt fingers knot in his hair. He moved at a fast pace, looking up at his lover every once in a while to look at Izaya's subtle facial expressions and know that he was doing a good job.

About a minute later, he swallowed the sticky liquid released into his throat. He returned the soft length to Izaya's boxers and rolled onto his side, graciously accepting the water he was given.

"That felt great. Thank you for doing that." Izaya slid down beside Masaomi and pulled him close, smiling as he affectionately played with his hair.

"I'm glad you liked it." He hugged his boyfriend, enjoying the praise he was given. Masaomi opened his eyes when he remembered something. "Hey, you said that we can do whatever I want when you get home, since you broke your promise of spending the day with me. Anything…"

"Yes, I did say that. What do you want to do?"

Masaomi hugged Izaya tighter, shaking a bit. "I… I want to top." He squeezed his eyes shut when he felt the informant stiffen. "You said anything," he added quietly.

"Okay," Izaya said after a while. "I feel bad for going back on my first promise, and I resolved to keep this one. If that's what you want to do, we will."

Masaomi looked up at Izaya with a wide smile. "Really? You're really okay with that? I'm so happy! I'll treat you well, and I'll make you feel great. But…" His smile wavered. "Will you enjoy it? If you do this only out of obligation and dislike it, then it won't be enjoyable for me."

"If you do it the way you did before, I'll like it," Izaya said with a surprisingly even tone. "You were good. I don't want this to be a regular occurrence, but I don't really _dis_like it, so it's fine. What position do you want me in?"

Kida's smile returned. "Whatever is most comfortable for you." He bit his lip when Izaya removed his boxers, and then got on his knees and forearms.

"I'm tired, so don't drag it out. Also, don't prepare me; just be slow at first."

The blonde excitedly pulled his member out and coated it generously with lubricant. He grabbed Izaya's hips and got in position behind him. "Are you ready?"

"Yes, go ahead." He did his best to relax when he was penetrated, both physically and emotionally uncomfortable. Even so, Masaomi wouldn't use something like this against him, so there was no need to fear ridicule or blackmail. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, acknowledging his lover's announcement that we would start moving. He let out a quiet moan, surprised that his prostate had been found right away.

"Does this feel good?" Masaomi stroked Izaya's lower back as he moved at a moderate pace.

"Mhm. You're doing nicely." Izaya grinned. "It must be because of all the practice you've had."

"Hey, no slut shaming. It offends me, you know. I'm not like that anymore."

"I'm submitting to you right now. I don't think a joke about your promiscuity is off limits when I feel vulnerable. I'm trying to make the situation better for myself."

"I see… That's fine, then."

Izaya moaned softly. "I'm going to finish soon."

"Me too." Masaomi moved faster. "Should I cum outside?"

"Always cum outside. Either that or use a condom."

Kida's breath caught. "Does that mean we'll be doing this in the future?"

"I… Well, I guess it would be okay on rare occasions. I want to top 95% of the time, though. This feels good physically, but I'm very uncomfortable playing the submissive role."

"Having you even consider allowing me to do this again feels amazing. I love that you trust me with this. I know that this is a difficult thing for you, and I appreciate you doing this for me."

"I'd rather talk about this later…" Izaya closed his eyes and rested his forehead on his arms.

Masaomi nodded. "Right, right. Of course. Sorry." He further picked up the pace, holding back when he felt Izaya's walls contract around him. He waited until his lover's orgasm was over, and then released in his boxers, moaning. He got off the bed and threw his boxers on the bathroom floor, put on new ones, and returned to the bed with a towel, not wanting to leave Izaya alone for too long. He smiled brightly as he cleaned off his lover. "I'm so happy."

Izaya kissed Masaomi's cheek as he sat still, letting the boy wipe away his release. "I know, dear."

Kida threw the towel towards the bathroom and lay down on his side, waiting for the man to do the same. He hugged his boyfriend and nuzzled into his chest. "I love you, Izaya."

Izaya stroked the boy's hair. "I love you too, Masaomi."

As sweet nothings were whispered into his ear and his back was rubbed soothingly, Masaomi fell asleep with a small smile.

* * *

><p>Masaomi looked up at Izaya as he took the small box handed to him. "What is it?"<p>

Izaya flopped down on the couch. He scooted close to Masaomi, resting his arm along his shoulders. "You have to open it, silly." He poked the boy's nose, smiling when he blushed in response.

"Right…" Masaomi subconsciously shifted so his side was touching Izaya as he opened the box. He stared at the contents in confusion for a while, not sure why such an object was given to him. When he realized it, he blushed deep red and stuttered. "Th-this is… It means…" He placed the box beside him and turned to hug the informant tightly, nuzzling into him when he felt an arm wrap around him.

"Folk lore says that lovers are connected by a red string from birth so they don't get separated. I thought it was about time we reinforced the idea with an actual object to remind us of our feelings for each other." He kissed the top of Masaomi's head.

Kida teared up. "I don't know what to say… Thank you for doing this. I love you so much."

"I love you too."

Masaomi nuzzled into Izaya's chest. "Do you want to have sex?"

"Yes," he answered plainly.

Masaomi blushed, not expecting such a blunt answer. Then again, Izaya wasn't really the type to be anything other than blunt. He didn't lie to spare the feelings of others, not even for Masaomi.

"But I told you I won't initiate, so it's not my decision."

Kida continued to hide his face. "Will you be upset if I don't come on to you and deny you?"

"I don't think 'upset' is the correct word. I'll be horny and somewhat irritable, and I might touch you in suggestive places, but nothing more."

Masaomi pulled away to look at Izaya. "Wouldn't touching me be initiating?"

"No. I won't try to have sex with you, but I might try to persuade you into getting me off, or play with your body."

"O-oh… Well, I'm not in the mood, but I feel bad for denying you, so you can touch me, I guess…"

"Thank you for giving me consent."

Masaomi paused. "Are you implying that you'd do it without my consent?"

"I'd stop if I felt that you really wanted me to."

"I see… Do what you want, then."

Izaya positioned Masaomi between his legs and instructed the boy to remove the clothing from the lower half of his body. Once he did, Izaya slid his hands all over Masaomi's thighs and torso. He sucked on his lover's neck and squeezed his shaft. "Look how big you've gotten already. I can feel it throbbing in my hand."

Masaomi turned his head and hid his face in Izaya's neck, blushing. He lightly bucked his hips into the hand, craving more. "Nnhh… Izaya," he moaned.

"You're quite worked up today, aren't you?" He moved his hand up and down at a slow pace, grinning at the reaction he got. "How lewd, moaning and squirming when I'm barely touching you," he teased.

"Izaya… Please touch me more," Masaomi breathed out shakily.

"As you wish." Izaya stroked much faster and played with his tip with his unoccupied fingers.

"A-ah!" Masaomi arched his back and climaxed, his eyes shutting as he fell into a state of bliss.

Izaya snickered. "That was fast." He started to stroke Masaomi's thighs, occasionally brushing over the soft length.

"If you do that again so soon, it might hurt," he protested.

"I'm not doing anything sexual. I just enjoy touching you. If there were a nonsexual way to feel inside you and touch your dick, I'd do it. I don't want to have sex every time I touch you in intimate places. Your moaning just turns me on and makes me want to go further."

Masaomi blushed lightly, strangely flattered. "Well, you can touch me there in that way if you want to, but I'll probably get turned on. It's difficult for me not to…"

Izaya kissed his lover's cheek. "Thank you. I'll start now. Can you slouch down a bit and lay your thighs over each of mine?" Once his request was fulfilled, he slid the pads of his fingers up and down Masaomi's member, just feeling the skin.

Unexpectedly, Kida didn't get hard. He watched the man touch him and, understanding that the actions weren't erotic, he didn't experience sexual pleasure. He smiled subtly, glad that he could give himself to his lover in such an intimate way. "Can I do this to you, too?"

"Sure." Izaya moved Masaomi's balls around in his hand, and then moved his fingers down, sliding two inside of him. He stroked and petted his walls, feeling them. "I'm impressed that you've been able to detach your libido from this activity. I wouldn't blame you if you couldn't, though." Izaya grabbed Masaomi's hand and brought it close to his hole. "Feel inside. You're so warm and tight."

Masaomi blushed and reluctantly obeyed, inserting two fingers, moving around with Izaya's fingers. When he brushed against his prostate, though, he immediately grew erect. He took his fingers out when instructed, and then moaned loudly, feeling two fingers from Izaya's other hand enter him. He came seconds later, trembling, exhaling shakily.

Izaya removed his fingers, wiped Masaomi off, and cleaned his hands with hand sanitizer from the table, offering it to Masaomi, as well. "I think that's enough for one day, huh? You seem awfully exhausted. Would you like to watch a movie together? It's all right if you fall asleep."

"Yes," Masaomi said simply. He put on his boxers and tugged the blanket thrown over him up a bit. He leaned back against his boyfriend's chest, relaxing completely, feeling safe in his arms. As Izaya talked about why he loved him, Masaomi drifted off, more content than he'd ever been.


	6. Chapter 6

_Disclaimer: This chapter is extremely kinky and graphic about acts that some may find weird and/or gross. If you don't like it, just skip ahead to the shower scene. Otherwise, enjoy the imagination of my perverted mind._

* * *

><p>"Izaya…?"<p>

The informant placed his chin in his hand and looked at the boy sprawled in his couch. "Yes, dear?"

"How come we haven't talked about…what happened?" Masaomi avoided the man's eyes, feeling uncomfortable about the topic, but curious as to why such a huge thing hadn't been discussed.

Izaya laid his arms on the armrests and leaned back in his chair. "Because our relationship is unstable. I can't talk to you about your suicide attempt when you're confused about what we mean to each other. That would be careless and harmful to your mental health. You've been sober since you got out of the hospital and haven't expressed any feelings about wanting to die or hurt yourself, so I don't see it as a huge issue."

"You don't think that me trying to take my own life is a huge issue?"

"Don't do that. You know that's not what I meant." Izaya left his desk for the couch. He lifted the boy's legs, sat down, and placed the limbs over his lap. "I think that it definitely needs to be discussed, but it is not of dire importance. That said, it's a bad idea to postpone it too long. It's already been almost three weeks since you left the hospital." He stroked Masaomi's legs. "Do you want to talk about it now?"

Masaomi continued to avoid the man's gaze. "Not really," he lied.

"You didn't even attempt to be convincing." He glanced at Masaomi's face. "We'll discuss it now. I've already read your note, so I know why you did it. Do you regret it?"

"Yes and no…" He finally looked at Izaya, feeling a bit uneasy. "Doing it made you realize your true feelings for me, and I'm not sure you would've done that if something that drastic hadn't occurred. However, despite the ache I felt from knowing—well, thinking—you didn't love me back, I like our relationship from back then more than what we have now."

"Interesting… You're only thinking of how it affected out relationship. There aren't any other things that changed because of that?"

"I stopped drinking, which is good, but no, our relationship is what drives me to live on. My life revolves around you—you're my god," Masaomi replied plainly. He flipped around so his head was in the man's lap, smiling softly when his hair was petted.

"Do you think that having me as your god is a bad thing?"

"Not really. I like being with you. Even when you're kind of shitty to me, sooner or later you always give me affection, and that's what I crave. You give me food, shelter, money, and love. That's all I really need. My god is immoral, selfish, and narcissistic, but he provides for me."

"Do you ever feel an urge to drink?"

"No, not at all, surprisingly. Even when I see alcohol on television or listen to my internet friends talk about their crazy drunken nights, I don't feel an urge to. I'm certain your methods broke my habit."

Izaya thought for a few moments. "Since you've been back from the hospital, have you considered suicide?"

"I thought about it a few times after being treated badly, but they were only brief thoughts, and I never dug further into them."

"I see… So, I know I've asked you something similar before, but this is slightly different. You say that you want us to go back to the way we were before the incident. That in mind, you're actively working to make me see you as an equal. You can't have both, and one is more attainable than the other. Do you believe there isn't a way to return to our previous relationship, or do you want to be treated as an equal more than to go back?"

Masaomi was silent for quite a while, thinking, not feeling rushed since he knew Izaya would patiently wait for a reply. "I guess…I would prefer to return to how we were, but I don't think it's possible. Despite how I felt pining after you, telling me you have the same emotion for me and putting the label of a couple on us makes your actions towards me seem wrong, like, you should be treating me better if you love me. I fully respect you, but that doesn't go both ways. The imbalance of power is somehow different because we're dating."

"Ah, I understand. We are 'together,' a 'couple,' 'dating,' and 'boyfriends' now. You connect these words with preconceived sentiments from the media and life experience. Couples are 'supposed to' be equals; I'm not 'supposed to' hit my boyfriend in order to discipline him. Masaomi, my feelings for you now are the same as they were back then. The only difference between then and now is that I've admitted my feelings to you and myself, and you've done the same. Think of it like coming out. If you told a friend you're gay, you'd be the same person you were before you told them, but they might view you differently than before. Our relationship is the same concept. I'm acting the same as before because I don't let those labels affect how I treat you. If you do the same, we can go back to the way we were before."

Masaomi smiled and sat up. He snuggled into his lover. "I'd really like that. However, we were together last time because you were helping me through a rough time. What will happen to us when I'm completely stable and don't need you to 'teach' me something? Is there even something like that we can use now?"

"I see where that could be an issue." Izaya wrapped an arm around Masaomi's waist. "We can have the same imbalance of power as before without using the excuse of me helping you through something to keep us together. There's an in-between here. We can't be exactly the same because the circumstances are different, but I'm confident you'll be happy if you simply don't let those labels form in your mind the relationship we 'should' have." Izaya kissed Masaomi's forehead. "Do you understand?"

Kida's smile widened. He closed his eyes and rested his head on the man's chest. "Yes, I understand. Thank you for helping me. You're right; I'm sure that I'll be happy now." He was silent for a few moments, basking in his happiness, almost purring from the pleasant feeling of his back being stroked. "I love you."

Izaya kissed the boy's forehead again. "I know."

The happiness that had consumed Masaomi moments ago suddenly left him like air from a balloon. He knew he was being tested. For what purpose, he didn't know, but he was certain that the reply was simply to see whether or not he could handle such a response. Despite his attempts, his insecurity overwhelmed him. He clutched onto Izaya's shirt and spoke in a small voice. "Please say it back."

The few seconds of silence seemed like hours. Then Izaya finally spoke in a genuine, light voice. "I love you too, Masaomi." He continued to rub his lover's back. "There's nothing to fear. I won't punish you for being insecure when you've lived your whole life craving attention and love. It's a bit pathetic, but it isn't your fault for growing up in a household where you weren't given attention. You envied the children with strict curfews; nobody cared if you returned home at 3:00 am. Kids were punished for skipping school; your parents weren't home to notice. Your peers fell in love and got into meaningful relationships; you latched onto any girl you could find and were left feeling emptier each time a petty romance ended." Izaya kissed Masaomi's wet cheek. "It's okay, you can cry. I've brought up traumatic experiences. Just know that all of that is over. I want to know where you're going when you leave the apartment and the time you'll return; I'll discipline you if you don't keep up with the schoolwork from the online classes I'm generously paying for; most importantly, our relationship will last as long as we are both alive—I'll never leave you. You have someone that cares about you now. You'll never be lonely again."

Masaomi stopped crying. He was silent, not sure how to respond to the sweet words. "Thank you," he said quietly. He looked up and smiled softly at his boyfriend. "Thank you so much. I'll never leave you, either. Do to me what you please; I know that your love for me means that you won't break me. You are my god, and I will forever worship you."

Izaya smirked. "You're lucky to worship an entity that loves you back. Many don't have that luxury. Don't take what I give you for granted. You should cherish my physical and figurative gifts always. Show your god devotion and you shall be rewarded."

Masaomi smiled again. He brushed through the soft, black hair of his lover. "Yes, I know. You've given me so much." He raised his wrist and touched the red piece of string ties around it. "I will never forget your generosity."

Izaya nudged Masaomi's cheek with his nose. "Alright, enough with the formality. What do you want for lunch?"

"Udon. Before that, I just want to say… I don't want to top anymore. I mean, I _want_ to—it feels great—but you have the power in this relationship, and giving me that freedom would be counterproductive to the relationship I want with you."

"Yes, I know."

Masaomi looked at him with confusion for a few moments, and then sighed. "I should've known that this was part of one of your plans. Are you going to tell me about it now?"

"Humans crave what is forbidden to them. You wanted to top because you thought it was impossible for you to experience that with me. Once I gave you the opportunity to top, you came to the conclusion on your own that you only want to bottom from now on. You won't pine after my ass because it's no longer unattainable."

Masaomi smiled and looked at Izaya adoringly. "You're so intelligent. I don't know how one person can be so…perfect. Your flaws are so small and petty that they're practically nonexistent. I can't believe I'm lucky enough to be in a relationship with someone as perfect as you."

Izaya pecked Masaomi's lips. "How flattering. You're making me kind of horny."

The younger male chuckled. "Right, I forgot that stroking your ego pretty much has the same effect as stroking your dick. I wish I could be as confident and self-aware as you are."

Izaya nibbled on Masaomi's ear. "I have a bit of an erection now. Are you going to initiate or preform a sexual favor?"

"So, you just assume that I'll do something about it?"

"Of course."

Kida smiled again. "Well, I love how you taste… Since I'm not in the mood, and I don't feel like I will be for a while, do you want to fuck my throat?" He blushed lightly, but held eye contact.

Izaya's smirk was deadly. "Get on your knees." He licked his lips as he watched his lover obey. He stepped forward and combed through the blond hair as he rubbed the tip of his semi-hard member against his cheek. "I'm going to cum on your face," he said plainly, in a matter-of-fact tone.

Masaomi merely smiled with his eyes, silently accepting what wasn't really a request. He opened his mouth when told, and then widened his eyes as his hair was painfully tugged on and a rather large object slammed into his throat. He forced down his gag reflex as Izaya thrust in and out of him at a fast pace.

"Touch yourself," Izaya said in a somewhat raspy voice coated in pleasure. He licked his lips as he saw his lover pull out his member and obey. "You're hard just from me fucking your throat? How lewd," he snickered. "Move your hand faster; I'm going to cum soon, and I want you to cum before me."

Masaomi followed the man's instructions once again, moaning in pleasure. He closed his eyes and blushed as he fantasized about being taken by his lover. He climaxed right away, his eyelids fluttering open to hold Izaya's gaze with a flushed face and eyes filled with lust.

"Close your eyes and stay still." Once he did, Izaya pulled out of Masaomi's mouth and stroked himself to completion. He shuddered as he spilled onto the boy's face and hair, spreading it around with his tip. "You look gorgeous covered in my semen. You can open your eyes now."

Kida blushed and smiled. "Thank you."

"Hey, you should tell me that I can initiate again. I want to cum on other parts of your body too."

Masaomi nodded. "Of course. Do whatever you want."

"Wonderful. Let's move to the bathroom. I don't want to get cum on the furniture." He grabbed the boy's hand, pulled him up, and practically dragged him into the bathroom. "You can look at yourself if you want to."

Masaomi looked in the mirror and immediately hardened. He heard a chuckle behind him as his lover removed the clothes from both of them.

"So, what body part should I cover next?"

"My ass," the younger male responded timidly.

"That's a fantastic idea. You don't mind if I skip preparation, right?" He grabbed lubricant and coated his erection in it.

Masaomi was far too turned on to refuse Izaya. He no longer had any control over what happened to him. "Do what you want. My body belongs to you." He touched the marking on his abdomen. He grabbed onto the counter and yelped when he was entered suddenly. His body trembled in pain; he could feel his walls tearing and a bit of blood running down his leg. He was silent for a few moments when the informant asked about his wellbeing, his voice sounding…genuine. His eyes lit up and his body relaxed completely. Would Izaya start to openly express concern for Masaomi now that he wasn't hiding his feelings? "It hurts—you're big—but I'll get used to it." He shut his eyes and tilted his head when he felt teeth and a tongue on his neck.

"I'm going to be rough with you throughout this session so I can cum sooner. I'm not going to drag this out."

Masaomi wasn't sure whether to thank him or be nervous about Izaya being rough repeatedly. In the end, he just let out a moan. Although, that was mostly brought on by his prostate being hit. Izaya probably caught on to his thoughts.

"Don't worry, dear. I won't leave you after this. I'll take good care of you, and I'll shower you with affection since I already know you'll be a very good boy."

"Thank you… I-Izaya, I'm going to…climax…hah…soon. What can I—nhh!—get dirty?"

"We're in the bathroom for that reason. You can cum on any surface in here. It'll be easy to clean up."

"Am I…allowed to n-now?"

Izaya nuzzled into the back of Masaomi's neck. "Yes. There's no need to ask for permission to orgasm during any of your activities unless I say otherwise."

"G-great. I-Izaya!" Masaomi called out his lover's name and climaxed, his cum dripping down the mirror.

Izaya held back his own orgasm. "I've changed my mind." He pulled out. "I'll be right back. You can sit on the floor if you want." He returned only a few moments later with a fluffy pillow. He put it on the floor and placed a considerable amount of towels in front of it. "Lie down on your back with your legs touching." He smirked as his order was followed out without question.

Masaomi lay down on the towels and rested his head on the pillow. He relaxed completely. "Thank you... You're being so nice to me."

Izaya crawled on top of Masaomi and kissed his forehead. "Is that not okay with you? I'm just making sure you're comfortable while I do quite a demeaning thing to you. I can be cruel if you want."

Masaomi shook his head almost violently. "No, no, this is great! I—" He was cut off by his own moan when he felt Izaya grab both of their dicks in his hand and grind against him. He shuddered in pleasure, wondering if Izaya was planning to let him cum as often as he was going to.

The older male came in just a few moments, letting out an exhale of relief, glad that he was finally able to release. He aimed his cum on Masaomi's chest and abdomen, licking his lips as he watched it spread around. "Your arms are next. Jerk me off with your right hand and aim it at your left arm. Just play with the tip with your left, since you aren't left-handed."

Once that task was fulfilled smoothly, Izaya slithered down Masaomi's body. "Grab your thighs and hold them against your abdomen. I'm getting sensitive, so these next two will be quick." When the boy was in position, Izaya thrust in roughly and picked up a fast, hard rhythm. The screams and moans turned him on, and he finished again in under a minute, aiming his rather large load of semen at each of Masaomi's thighs. He slammed back in after a few moments of rest, hitting his lover's prostate dead-on. He came right after Masaomi, spilling inside of him. He repeated the pattern a few times until he heard squelching in his thrusts. "Hmm... I don't want any of that leaking out. Stay here."

Izaya left the room again, returning in a minute with a red spandex thong. He put it on Masaomi. "How sexy~. Stand up and see if it works."

Not quite understanding the purpose, Masaomi grabbed the tub and used it to get on his wobbly legs. His eyes widened and his hand flew to his mouth when he moved. The color on his face matched the thong as he touched his stomach.

"So, what's it like?"

Masaomi grabbed on to the counter. "I can...feel it moving around inside me."

Izaya's grin turned deadly. "Feel what?"

Somehow, Masaomi's face turned even redder. "Your...cum." Knowing he'd have to repeat it, he decided to say it again on his own. "I-I can feel your cum inside of me," he said loudly.

"That's very erotic. Let's continue. We only have a few more minutes to go." He pulled the thong aside, entered Masaomi, and grabbed his hips. "Just a few more places."

A few minutes later, Masaomi's back and rear were covered in white liquid, and he was on his knees licking and sucking on his boyfriend's member.

"That's enough." He pulled out and pushed Masaomi's head down. "I want to stain this gorgeous hair." He moved his wet length around in the strands, moaning at the strange feeling. "Hah... Masaomi, use your fingers to stimulate my prostate. Be rough." He waited patiently for the boy to obey him. Once he did, he continued to slowly rub his member against Kida's head. He came a few seconds later, releasing into the hair, making it matte from the sticky substance. "I want to cum inside you once more. Stand up."

The younger male reluctantly stood up, almost falling down from the strange feeling in his lower abdomen. Since the thong had been put on him, Izaya had released inside him two more times. He knew his lover was kinky, but this was beyond anything he could imagine. It apparently turned Izaya on, but he felt no pleasure. As the informant thrust into him again, all he felt was humiliation from how he looked, great discomfort from feeling the liquid move inside him, fear because his lower abdomen was slightly, but still undeniably _protruding_. He wanted to cry, throw up, and pass out all at once. He just wanted the experience to be over. But he didn't dare oppose Izaya. As much as he disliked what was happening to his body, he knew that Izaya wouldn't put his health at risk. Besides that, his discomfort was obvious, and Izaya had been proving himself to be a loving, caring partner, somehow. He had faith in his boyfriend.

The feeling of wanting to throw up returned when Izaya released inside of him again and poked his abdomen. "Oh my." He grabbed Masaomi's chin and forced him to face into the mirror. "Look at yourself. Your body is covered in semen, inside and out. What do you think your parents and peers would say if they saw you like this? Disgusted? Disappointed? Horrified? Probably all three, huh?" He grabbed Masaomi's hand and stroked it with his thumb. "It's all right to cry. Let it out. Come on, your lover is going to take care of you now."

Izaya led the sniffling boy into the shower. "First, just stand under the faucet and get as much off as you can. I'll wash the rest off for you." He waited for Masaomi to be done. "Good. Most of it is off. Okay, hold on to me now." Izaya kissed Masaomi's forehead as he wrapped an arm around his waist, holding the boy against him. His other hand swiftly pulled down the thong.

Masaomi sobbed. The feeling of all that liquid leaving him was probably the worst thing he'd ever experienced, and the hand stroking his back and the soothing words didn't help at all. He hugged Izaya tightly, wanting it to be over, too disgusted to care about how humiliating it was. He looked up at the man with red, puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks when told. Everything horrible that he'd felt in the last 15 or so minutes of their intimate encounter faded away instantly. He didn't feel the remaining fluid slowly dripping out of him; he couldn't remember how it felt to have that inside of him. He stared breathlessly at his lover, who was looking at him with such strong desire, utter adoration, and obvious love. He'd never been looked at in such a way, and he felt heat rise to his cheeks from the intensity of it.

Kida wondered if Izaya had somehow drugged him when they got into the shower. He spent the rest of the time making out with his lover, nuzzling into him, and listening to the honest confessions of why Izaya loved him. He was in a daze as the man washed his body and hair. When it was over, he felt warmth as he was dried off, wrapped in a towel, and carried to the bed.

"How are you feeling?" Izaya ran his fingers through Masaomi's wet hair as he sat on the bed, with Masaomi lying beside him.

"I feel...wonderful. Did you drug me?"

Izaya chuckled. "No. Do you feel drugged?"

"You're just...being so overwhelmingly kind. I figured you're either faking it, or I'm imagining it because of some drug."

"I told you before, didn't I? I'm giving you the affection you deserve after being put through that experience. You liked it at first, but the last bit of it you spent feeling disgusted and humiliated. I wouldn't cause you that kind of pain without showing you love and care afterwards. I'm not faking any of this. I love you."

Masaomi teared up again. "I love you too." He grabbed Izaya's hand and linked their fingers together. "Did you...enjoy that?"

Izaya smiled. "Yes, I really did. I'm very appreciative to you for participating and sticking through it to the end. We won't be doing anything like that again. That was a fantasy I wanted to try with you. It's been fulfilled now, and I have no desire to repeat it."

The few tense muscles still in Masaomi's body relaxed. He felt like he was dreaming of a perfect life. "Okay."

Izaya bent down to kiss Masaomi's cheek. "I'm going to clean up the bathroom. Take a nice, long nap. We'll have a relaxing night when you wake up."

Kida nodded. He watched Izaya walk away and fell into a deep slumber immediately, exhausted, and optimistic that he and Izaya would be able live a happy life together.


	7. Chapter 7

_Durarara!x2 is almost here, and hopefully the revived fandom will produce more IzaKida fics. _

_Some updates... To all that have asked and those that are wondering, yes, I still intend to write a sequel for The Puppetmaster; I have snippets written already. It's my most popular story, and I've gotten inquires about the promised sequel many times. I have no idea where this story is headed right now, but I'll start publishing the sequel next. Also, I am still working on In Your Arms. I've hit a crossroad, and I don't know which path I want to go down, so that's why the update has been taking/will still take a while. I work on this story the most because Drowning was my favorite story to write, and I want to keep the complex relationship formed in this story going on. Even so, neither Drowning nor Burning has been received in the way I'd hoped (funny how the stories of mine I don't like much get more attention than the ones I really want attention for), so I get a bit discouraged about whether my readers are enjoying my writings or not. It does really help my confidence to know that (with positive reviews) I'm doing well, or (with constructive criticism) people care enough about the story to want to help make it better. Please comment/favorite/follow/pm me. That said, many people who follow my stories are very supportive, mostly with pm's. You guys are awesome!_

_Happy holidays, everyone! ^_^_

* * *

><p>Masaomi awoke to soft touches on his face and in his hair. He smiled and closed his eyes again, enjoying the pleasant feelings of Izaya's fingers in his hair and his lips on his skin. "Izaya," he breathed, his tongue still tingling from the familiarity of the name. Even after three weeks, it still excited him to not use any kind of honorific. It was intimate, and he loved that.<p>

"It's time to get up, darling. It's 13:00 already; you slept for 16 hours. I've made you lunch."

Kida's eyes fluttered open. He rubbed them with his hand. "Really?"

Izaya chuckled. "Yes. Why are you surprised?"

"Well, you don't normally wake me up to give me a homemade meal. Are you still being nice because of yesterday?"

"No. I'm hungry, so I figured that I'd make lunch for both of us, wake you up, and eat together with you. Do you feel like I still owe you something for what you did for me last night?"

Masaomi shook his head. "No, it's fine. But... Did I really sleep for 16 hours?"

"You woke up around midnight because of a nightmare, so I gave you a low dose of anxiety medication to help you get back to sleep. I guess I gave you more than necessary."

"I don't remember that at all... Thanks for taking care of me." He wrapped his arms around the man and nuzzled into his chest.

Izaya let out a breathy laugh. "Do you think I'm incapable of being a decent person? You woke up in fear, unable to fall back asleep, so I gave you medication, said soothing things, and rubbed your back to help you sleep. Is that strange?"

"I guess not. Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you..."

The informant smiled and ruffled his lover's hair. "I'm not offended, dear. Don't worry about it. I just don't want you to think that you can't come to me when you need help. I love you, Masaomi, and I want you to be happy. Things like waking me up during the night because you're scared, or calling me to come home because you feel unsafe don't bother me. Your safety, health, and happiness are of great importance to me. We don't have some petty, fleeting romance; we're in a devoted, passionate relationship. I may be cold and uncaring towards most other people, but you're different. Okay?"

Masaomi hugged Izaya tightly. "Okay. I know all of that; I just...forget sometimes. I'm not used to this kind of treatment, so it's difficult to believe that I can bother someone with trivial matters like insecurities and small fears."

"Mhm. It will take some time to adjust, but I'll be supportive and understanding of the pace you learn these things."

Kida smiled brightly and pecked Izaya's lips. "Thank you. You're the best!"

Izaya smiled softly and ran his fingers through blond hair. "Come on. Let's go eat now."

Masaomi nodded. "Oh, yes! I'm very excited to eat what you've made for us." He grabbed the hand offered to him and followed Izaya downstairs. "This looks delicious!" He sat down at the table and immediately started to eat the prepared meal of a breakfast sandwich, fruit, and coffee. "It really is delicious. Thanks so much!" He looked to the man sitting beside him and beamed.

Izaya ruffled Kida's hair and also started to eat his food. Once he finished his small portion, he cleaned up, and then returned to his seat. "What would you like to do when you finish?"

Masaomi stuffed his mouth with the remaining food, chewed, and swallowed. He took a sip of his coffee, and then straddled the older male's lap. "We should have sex—however you want."

Slender hands grasped Kida's hips. "Tempting, but I'd rather not have sex immediately after having a large meal."

The blond tilted his head to the side, confused. "What do you mean? Will you get cramped up or something?"

"Do you really not understand what I'm talking about? Have you ever had sex after eating?" When Masaomi shook his head, he sighed. "I'd rather not explain this. Let's just wait a few hours before we do anything."

The teenager pouted. "Please tell me. I want to know."

Izaya sighed again. "Masaomi, what do people usually do after having a large meal?"

"Well, they—" He cut himself off, blushing heatedly as he finally realized what his lover meant. "Oh, r-right. We'll just...wait, th-then," he stuttered, everything from his neck up turning a shade of red.

Izaya looked at Masaomi with an amused smile. "I have some work to do. It's not too important, so you can watch television with the volume on."

Kida nodded vigorously, grateful that the subject had been quickly changed. "I-I'll clean up my dishes and turn on a show."

About two hours later, Masaomi awkwardly turned off the television and stood up. "I'm, um, going to brush my teeth..." He scurried up the stairs and into the bathroom to brush his teeth, as well as do his business. He let out a yelp when he opened the door. A hand flew to his heart. "Izaya, you scared me." He blushed lightly. "Why...are you staring at me like that?" he asked timidly, averting his eyes away from the intense gaze. "Unf!" His back suddenly hit the wall and his wrists were pinned above his head. His lover kissed him roughly. "What...nnh...are you doing?"

Izaya grunted in annoyance, impatient. "Kissing you, obviously. Now shut up and start moving your mouth against mine." He pulled Masaomi away from the wall to grab his waist.

Masaomi turned his head. "Don't talk to me like that," he said timidly, not sure if he was allowed to say something so domineering.

Izaya pecked Masaomi's cheek. "I want to make out with you. Are you okay with that?"

"Well, y-yes... Thank you for asking so nicely." He let Izaya's tongue into his mouth and followed his rhythm, submitting.

Kissing Izaya was like falling asleep. More specifically, it was like the state between consciousness and being asleep. A loud noise or jolting movement could wake Masaomi up, but nothing else could tear his concentration away from the softness of Izaya's lips, the taste that wasn't delicious in itself, but exhilarating precisely because it was _Izaya's_ taste. Hands roamed his body in sensual ways, bordering the edge of sexual, but never crossing it. It was intoxicating, and that's why Masaomi was surprised when he fell onto the bed. He didn't remember being backed into it. But there he was nonetheless, regrettably breaking the trance of the kiss. Everything was now escalating quickly. Clothes were roughly torn off both of them; his neck and shoulders were assaulted with teeth and hot breaths; hands grabbed at and pushed on his skin; the sound of the bottle of lubricant being opened was deafening. Masaomi was breathless for entirely different reasons than before. Weak arms pushed against the chest of the man on top of him, not strong enough to get him off, but profound enough to make Izaya understand the gesture.

Izaya pulled away, his face slightly flushed in the way that always made Masaomi feel confident that the silent, controlled man was affected by their activities. "What is it?" he asked in the even voice that made Masaomi doubt his abilities to properly please his lover.

"I feel...lightheaded." It was a rather understated description of his state. In reality he was, well, detached from reality. His vision was blurry, his body felt heavy, the back of his knees and neck were covered in cold sweat, his stomach was nauseous, and he was hyperventilating. Izaya seemed to understand that his condition was more serious than him being lightheaded.

"Do you want to stop...?"

Masaomi pushed through his discomfort to give his lover an unamused look. "Obviously."

Izaya ignored the stare and biting tone. "What should I do?"

"I don't know," Masaomi said breathlessly. "Figure something out. Just do something—anything."

Izaya grabbed the boy's boxers, pants, and shirt, and started to clothe him. "I think it would be best for you to fall unconscious for a while. I'm going to strangle you—it's the quickest way."

"Well, okay, if you think it will help..."

"Why do you trust me?"

The younger male's expression turned confused. He spoke more clearly as his breathing leveled. "Why would you ask that? It's hardly appropriate timing, as well."

"The timing is perfect, actually. I told you that I plan to strangle you, and you agreed without hesitation. What if strangling will make things worse, or you feel a lot of pain...or I kill you?"

Masaomi's expression showed that he was slightly baffled. Questions like those were a regular occurrence from Izaya, but that didn't mean he had become accustomed to it. On the contrary, as deviating and twisted as he knew the informant was, his actions and words still consistently bewildered his younger lover.

He was silent for a while, trying to think of an answer. Indeed, why _did_ Masaomi trust Izaya, knowing what he was, experiencing the pain of his betrayal? But the answer was simple: He didn't trust Izaya—not with everything. He voiced his thoughts, because he wouldn't be punished for speaking the truth. "I don't trust you fully, but there are certain things I trust you with. With this, you have no reason to deceive me." He answered each part of Izaya's question, because he know it would be brought up again another time if he didn't go about it in a systematic way. "I know you won't make things worse because there's no reason to; sure, you enjoy causing me physical pain sometimes, but only when I consent to it; I wouldn't be here with you if you didn't have use for me, so there's no sense in fearing that you'll try to kill me."

Izaya's unsettling smile wasn't new, but like his strange questions, it wasn't something with which he could simply become acclimated. His eyes pierced into him in a way that felt like he was peering into your soul, looking for fears, desires, and anything that could be used against him. Izaya didn't commend him for his answer or try to tell him he was wrong. He simply stared until Masaomi felt uncomfortable enough to look away. He reflexively returned his gaze to the man when he spoke.

"Do you feel better now?"

Masaomi blinked, not sure what he was talking about. When he realized it, he looked at the informant with slight awe. "You said those things and asked that question to calm me down, didn't you?" When his question wasn't answered, he sighed, knowing the silence meant he was correct. He ran his fingers through the black hair, not sure what else to do.

Izaya mimicked the gesture with both of his hands, occasionally tugging lightly on the blond hair.

"Izaya..."

"I know. We don't have to."

Masaomi frowned. "But I refuse so often. Won't you become frustrated and...?" He didn't finish his sentence, not sure the direction in which he was headed.

As usual, Izaya knew what he was trying to say. "What? If I become too frustrated I'll force you, cheat on you, or break up with you? I won't do any of those things. I got my fill last night; I don't have an incredibly strong urge for more. We could seldom be intimate and I'd be satisfied. I enjoy sex with you because I find you attractive, you're good in bed, and I love your reactions. In the past, I only indulged in sex when I was bored, or my urges started to make me uncomfortable. Our relationship isn't built on physical intimacy; we don't have to be constantly intimate. I simply enjoy your company."

Masaomi blinked away tears, smiling brightly. "Thank you, Izaya." He sat up and hugged the man.

Izaya loosely wrapped one arm around Masaomi's waist and kissed his temple. "I wonder what that says about you—thanking me for not forcing you into sex or sleeping with someone else because you refuse. It's interesting, don't you think?"

Kida groaned. "Don't analyze me over something like this. Our relationship isn't 'normal', so I can't assume things about it that pertain to 'normal' romantic relationships."

A soft chuckle escaped the informant's lips. "Fair enough."

Masaomi fell onto his back and closed his eyes. "Let's talk about something else."

"Sure." Izaya ran his fingers along the boy's forearm. "What do you want to talk about?"

"I don't know. Well..." He opened one eye and looked at Izaya. "Isn't your birthday in two days?"

"Yes, it is. Would you like me to spend the day doing something with you?"

"It's _your_ birthday, though. You should choose. What do you want to do, and what present do you want?" He opened both eyes to look at Izaya expectantly.

"Well, those things go hand-in-hand. I don't want you to buy me anything; I want my gift to be something special we do that day. However, I'm not going to tell you what I want until that day."

"Um, why?"

"I don't want you to have time to think over the activity too much."

Masaomi rolled onto his side and tugged on Izaya's arm, signaling that he wanted the informant to lie beside him. Once his silent request was fulfilled, he wrinkled his nose. "Saying that makes it sound like it's something I'll hate."

"I don't think you'll _hate_ it, but it's not something you'd do without some persuading."

Kida grabbed Izaya's hand. "Does it have to do with sex?" he asked quietly.

"Not entirely, but it would be included in that day. You can refuse, as always, of course, but I really would like to be intimate with you on that day. We can hold off on sex until then, if you want. Does that sound good?"

"I guess so, yeah. I know you genuinely love and care for me, so you won't do anything too horrible. Your birthday should be celebrated in the way you choose, so I'll fulfill your wishes as best as I can." He smiled brightly at his partner.

A large grin stretched across Izaya's face. "Thank you, Masaomi. This could be the best birthday I've ever had."


End file.
